I have heard a lot about you and would like to do some work experience with you. I enclose my CV which is quite short as I only left university last year.
You will be surprised – or not – that I, along with everyone else, receives requests like these every week (yes, every week). You will not be surprised that often, your request goes ignored.
Think how you can make your request stand out from everybody else’s. First of all, explain why you’d like work experience with me instead of someone else (if you can’t answer that, then you’re up shit creek). Your two lines is far too short – yes, keep it short & snappy but not that short.
The second thing that no-one ever does but should, is to explain what you can offer me rather than what I can offer you. Organisations, whether they are commercial or charitable, are busy places these days and they want a succinct summary of what, how, why, when in an easy to digest email which they can then reply to quickly or forward on to the right person. Try it and see – then tell me how quickly you get a placement!