When I was at school, a classmate of mine told me that a member of staff had had a ‘secret moment’ with her. I didn’t believe her, because I knew that member of staff and it had never happened with me.
Anyway my friend had to leave the school– she had emotional and behavioural difficulties and back then the school didn’t have any policies for dealing with it. Recently I was shocked to read in a newspaper that the member of staff had been taken to court over alleged child abuse, and I keep remembering my friend. Is there anything I can do?
Gosh, this is a really difficult one, especially with everything that’s happening in the news at the moment. It is tricky and I don’t have enough information to give you guidance.
Are you in touch with her already or would this be a fresh contact after 15 years? Think about you getting in touch after so long and how it will feel to her. Some survivors say they feel guilty and alone so you contacting her might make her feel less alone and believed after all this time. I know the NSPCC do some work in this area, but now she is an adult, hopefully she is getting some support (try Signhealth) so she feels understood and supported.
Please think though about why you want to contact her. Is it to make yourself feel better, rather than making her feel better? Harsh, but true. I’d very much welcome comments from adult survivors about what they’d really like to see from their friends.